When it rains it (deluges great heaping piles of migraine floods) pours

Life can really feel like so much muchness sometimes. Looking, looking, looking for work. I pitched a few story ideas to the Editor of the Magazine that I’ve been working part-time (small fry) for (wow – five years now!). She accepted one of the pitches, which is a very bright spot right now.
Right now my grandparents are soon to move here from North Carolina. I am to assist them in finding their dream assisted living facility (oxymoron?) for my sweet grandfather has Alzheimer’s disease and my grandmother needs help to care for him.
Right now we have zero money.
Right now my younger son needs to have an MRI to check to see if he has a medical issue that my older son suffered through at exactly the same age.
Right now I’m waiting to hear from the principal at my children’s school on whether he would consider hiring me as the school’s Media Specialist (Librarian). I’d like to say that I’m not holding my breath but then you would see that I’m lying, as my face turns blue.
That job – while it would not further my writing career - would solve so many problems at once that it makes my head spin. I love books, I love kids, I love my kids’ school, I love a school schedule because it is the same schedule as my kids’, and I love that a consistent paycheck would give our family the relief we so desperately need.
Trouble is, I think that a.) There are a lot of out of work teachers out there who would be better qualified for the job b.) I would need to go back to school while working full-time to get the 30 extra credit hours I need to be certified to be the an educational Media Specialist.
All I can do is my very best and pray that it’s what God has in mind.

Dork Incorporated

Here is my head (shot).

Yes, I know why it’s called a “head shot” but you know (head smack). I just have to think about it a little bit more. Doing this did feel like shot in the head – like I am big dorky dorkington. My friend Laura (visit her on blogspot at Seahorse Studios! ) is a sweetheart and I think she has the patience of a saint. I kept sticking my tongue out and making stupid faces. The whole experience made me wonder if I’m really ready for jobs with grown-ups.

Get over yourself.

One of the saddest things about hunting for a job is realizing that there are jobs out there that I don’t even want to do, applying for them anyway, and not even getting a phone call. Ugh. Today, I sent a resume in to be a church secretary. Oh man. Talk about beggars can’t be choosers. However, the hours are right (no childcare needed), the church is about three blocks away and there is a tiny bit of publication work in the form of newsletters, bulletins, and other church publications. Now, I’m thinking, I don’t know anyone who has moved on from working at a church to a major publishing house or ad agency. I’m thinking, how awesome will it be to introduce myself to my husband’s banker cohorts as a ‘church secretary’? (As awesome as saying I’m a stay-at-home-mom. Conversational arsenic.) I’m thinking, Self, are you just applying for this position so that you don’t have to go after what you really want and are too chicken to reach out there and grab it? Then I say, SELF! Who says you can’t do both? Our financial situation has reached a precipice so frightening that pride is a luxury I cannot afford. I could do this job and still, in whatever tiny corner in my day I could find, eek out a little bit of creativity.
Any bets on whether they will even call me for an interview?